"Can I Give Someone Your Number?"

This is the question your married friends ask when they start getting worried about your single status. Lol. They, with the best intentions, feel the need to help and so they scan through their list of friends and their husband’s list (or vice versa) and they realize there’s one brother that just might be right and so they ask: "Can I give someone your number?" Lemme just say, I’m not one for match-making in this sense because there is something about meeting someone this way that doesn’t really work in my opinion.

Let me explain: I like things to happen organically. You know, boy meets girl, boy is interested in girl, so boy tries to get to know girl, and it goes on and on from there. I feel like the pressure is ON when a guy is given a girl’s number. Everyone is aware of WHY the number was given and what is expected and I think that takes away the thrill of the chase for the hunter and hunted. Lol. There’s no guessing whether he likes you or not and if he will pursue (although the guessing bit I could do without sometimes. LOL). You know what I mean? Even if he doesn’t end up liking her or vice versa, it will take a certain level of maturity (or maybe it’s not even about maturity) for the whole scenario not to ruin the chances of these two human beings ever becoming friends. It would make things SO weird if it doesn’t “work out” or lead to more. So to the question “Can I give someone your number”, there’s usually a little more hesitation these days.
That being said, PEOPLE ARE NOT MEETING PEOPLE THESE DAYS!!!!!! Let me prove it. When was the last time YOU met someone new? Ask your friends the same question and you’ll see what I mean. I talked about Speed Dating a while ago and it seems people need to or maybe should start looking for unconventional ways to meet people. The only thing is that just like with the “Can I give someone your number?” scenario, it seems like going out of your way to meet people also takes out the fun. *sigh* Who knows! I think it’s important to try new things, be more sociable in general and like I always say not necessarily (just) so you can meet your spouse but more importantly to make your life more colorful!
What say ye? Do you think being match-made takes away the fun of chasing and being chased? Do you think people need to get over it and be open to as many options as possible and stop thinking too hard??


BTW, here are some interesting first dates I’m thinking would be great to try: fishing and/or visiting a farm. Don’t ask. #random



Picture courtesy cocoamode.wordpress.com

Comments

  1. I had this done for me recently.... reinforced my not liking matchmaking.

    I'm all up for things happening organically mehn. It's just easier. Sigh.

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  2. Interesting subject. Times have changed and the old ways aren't quite as effective anymore. Everyone seems to be too busy, male and female alike. Those that are not so busy still can't get to meet the busy ones. It's frustrating when you think of it and are probably a victim. 'Giving someone your number' may just be a semi-adequate response to the times. Come to think of it, what other methods are there? Facebook? twitter? Those are almost as random too.

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  3. A subject close to most people's everyday itenary these days yet it seems to rate almost last on the list..as you quite rightly said we're all just so busy that trying to get to know someone is a chore!!.

    I think whats happened is the medium of communication now is so varied and wide that we've literally become hostage to making a choice there is less focus in what we are looking for.
    I mean now you get the same people logged into numerous dating websites, there's a plethra of speed dating events advertised running monday to friday it's fun fun fun! yet there is no real out put from the fun. We need to reduce the virtual chit chat and get out there and I like the idea of a date at the farm one with nature what could be better than that lol

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  4. @hunter/hunted (I like)...

    I had this conversation with a friend last week... I too don't believe in being introduced as I say, what I'm looking for can't be find on the high street

    @randomlymeetingsomeonetotallyrandom

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  5. @hunter/hunted (I like)...

    I had this conversation with a friend last week... I too don't believe in being introduced as I say, what I'm looking for can't be found* on the high street

    @randomlymeetingsomeonetotallyrandom

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  7. I say do not think outside the Box think like there is no Box. All this thrill of the chase and stuff has made people loose the right Man or Woman. Times have changed and measure must change too. No everyone has the same story because there are no rules to Love. Love is a choice its something you willing do. The right Man or Woman comes and people get so caught up in other stuff they forget about the main goal. Many people have lost their soul mates just because the lost focus of the main goal. I say any way He or She comes is not important. For me let her JUST COME! PLEASE

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  8. I have no issues with giving out boyfriend's or girlfriend's phone number. But question is, why would I be doing that? That my friend is single and available isn't good enough. I should be fairly certain the two intended individuals have a chance of compatibility, otherwise the match make would be DOA!

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  9. The thing is d whole 'number giving' scenario births something predatory in d guys mind towards d girl. I feel subconsciously he'd see her as desperate.

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  10. I used to think this too before I got married. My hubs and I were "Introduced" and we still had the 'hunter'/hunted' scenario. It depends on both parties. I dont believe in limiting possibilities when it comes to love...you need to be willing to push some boundaries but stick to your standards at the same time which can be tough, I know, but the key is striking a balance.As you've pointed out, there is a fat chance of meeting someone new nowadays, never mind developing a relationship.
    I am actually one of those people you described who give their friends numbers to other singles if I feel there is a chance of a connection. I only do this with my really really close friends though and I try to do it in a light hearted way...it doesnt all have to be so serious!

    http://youngnaijawoman.wordpress.com/

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  11. I get that a lot and I find it quite tiresome. I can't intorduce a lady to my friends without them badgering me with "is she the one?" Questions and expressions! Whenever folks close to me suggest that I meet with someone it most always ends in a mis-match, but a few of my die-hard friends and family don't wanna stop. Very good piece, cheers

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