Welcome! Here, you'll find a collection of my thoughts, observations, and conversations on love & relationships.
I've got articles, podcasts, videos, and more! Stay a while and have a look around.
Love is NOT a fight. Mars & Venus MUST unite!
This is Africa's #1 Resource for Love & Relationships.
The Best Thing About Being Single
You’ve probably heard the saying “The single want to be
married. The married want to be single”. That saying holds some weight because
before you get married, that’s all you can usually think about – how awesome it
would be to be married. Then when you get married, sometimes (not all the
time), you start to yearn for your single days. Not because you don’t love your
spouse but because you miss some of the benefits of being single.
For those of you who are single, I want to encourage you
to enjoy every single moment of your “singleness” because when you get married,
you are gonna yearn for these days sometimes. I'd say to somewhat minimize (although I’m
not sure you can) the yearnings, make a conscious effort to relish and thoroughly enjoy
being single and everything that comes with it.The same energy you dispense longing for marriage, use the same amount to enjoy being single, if you know what I mean.
So what’s the best thing about being single. Well, there
are many “best things” about being single and here are some of them:
to do whatever you want!!! When you’re single, you might not
appreciate this very much because you actually long to be able to do stuff with
someone but I say, relish this freedom. Milk
the mess out of it because when you get married, you’re gonna have to consult
with someone regarding pretty much your every move. I know that sounds like
bondage (lol) but it’s not. It’s just the reality of marriage!
to spend however you want!!! Your money is YOUR money.
Ain’t no discussions about “our money vs. my money”. You don’t have to consult
with someone before you make any major purchases. You just do what you wanna
do. You’re not sharing a bank account with someone and you don’t have to
question why money was spent a certain way on a certain thing. You plan your
budget solo and you decide what you save, how you invest, etc. In marriage most
if not ALL of that WILL change! Brace yourself!
to go wherever you want and stay there for as long as you want!!!
Similar to freedom to do whatever you want, when you’re single, you can go wherever
you want and stay there till the next morning if you chose and ain’t nobody asking
you where you are or telling you when you should be home. You’ve probably
noticed this when you go out with married friends. They’re usually the first to
leave ( especially if their spouse is in town and in some cases, regardless). Oh,
and no more sleepovers. You go out to a friend’s house, it’s late, you still
gotta get your butt home. You can’t just sleep on their couch anymore (there
could be exceptions but you get the
to wear whatever you want!!! When you’re single, you dictate your wardrobe and everything
that goes with it (hair, nails, shoes, etc.) but when you get married, someone
else (your wonderful spouse) will have a say in what you wear and how you look.
In some cases, that is a great thing because they would be saving you from
yourself! (Lol) but in other cases, you might have to make changes (compromise)
that you’re not very comfortable or happy about.
I could go on and on but I think y’all single folk get
the picture. Yeah, you REALLY want to be married but while you wait for that to
happen, make sure you are enjoying all the stuff I mentioned above because when
you’re married, particularly if you didn’t make a conscious effort to relish
these things, you will long for your single days like no man’s busness! Lol.
If you’re married and reading this, I would love for you
to share what you miss about being single. It doesn’t mean you don’t love being
married but what are some things that you don’t get to do now that you’re
married? Please share… P.S. Y'all know I love love and marriage so I'm not trying to make marriage look like bondage. I'm just keeping it real! ;)