How We Met Day 4: Twists & Turns!

It's Day 4 of the How We Met series! Today, it's all about twists and turns and unplanned encounters! I hope these stories and the others make you smile and remind you to keep an open mind and heart.

Here's D.O.S.'s story:

I was at Roberts Cafe per usual on th‎is night, sometime in the year 2009 and having been bereft of my usual sitting space just inside the restaurant area by the large windows (a group of girls were having a baby shower), I went to sit outside on the garden chairs (my second favourite spot) .

One of the ladies from the event, known as So-Hi, came ‎outside for a cigarette break and asked if I minded. I looked up from the novel I was reading and said 'Of course not! You can sit here with me if you like.'

She smiled and sat down and introduced herself, as did I. After a short silence I said to her 'Tell me your secret.' she was surprised but smiling broadly. 'Are you serious?!' she asked in her polished British accent and I said yes. 

"Naaaahhh! You're crazy!" she said laughing, but not before the pause that told me she was considering doing so.

That's how we got talking. She never went back into the Baby Shower. One by one her friends left and for four hours we gisted like old friends and laughed with interlocked arms to our cars.

'There's a thing I do for women here every Friday. We just gather and talk, cos you know we have and go through many issues as women and Nigeria doesn't help at all with its own wahala.' I was like 'really?!' (i didn't have a lot of female friends). I was clearly unsure. 'No, seriously, they are prominent women in their own right who have gone through some major issue or another. We learn a lot from each other. You should come. I really like how your mind works.'

So I was there the next Friday and that was my first time properly meeting the Smokers Room Family. The women were powerful! I learnt so much. 

I noticed that guys would come in, peep, see the group and nod like 'Oh, you guys are here.'. Two of those guys were "Jay" and "Tee" (who became my husband) .

It became So -Hi's mission to 'get you (me) married!' and she said 'I have boys you know, fine boys! There's Jay and there's Tee...but Tee is too smooth; he's a fine boy that's too quiet and smooth joor...so maybe Jay. I think Tee is even engaged or something.'

That's how she introduced me to two of her 'boys ' with an 'isn't she just beautiful?! Brilliant lawyer ooo!' (she didn't know that, she just liked me. LOL) .

They said hello but not much else. 

Thing is I'd seen them check me out once before I was even introduced to them but neither of them said anything to me.

Fast forward a few months and I'm now used to seeing them and one day, Tee is sitting in front of me and was just joining in the conversation anyhow! Lol. 

Apparently, he'd been watching me all that time and had decided he liked me. He said he knew from my conversations that I was serious-minded (his polite way of saying I was too stiff ‎and strict), and knew he could not approach me from the 'toaster' angle so he decided to become my friend. 

I was at the end of a bad relationship myself and so it was easy to be friends. Because he was quiet I could pour myself out. He was also relieving himself of the relationship quagmire he was in.

So we just dished out our hurts into one another's ears and by the 28th of May, 2010 we both had a long talk where we decided we did not want to be side anything to either of our nearly ended partners and would be together. I said I was there for fun; to rest because I was broken - badly so. He said on that day that the way he felt, he knew it was for marriage. I stopped him from speaking and said life was full of broken promises and even he did not know if he'd hurt me - he only knew what he felt right then. He affirmed his position and I made to walk off. He pulled me back and said he'd go at my pace.

There were a number of issues - many, but when he proposed 3 years later on 16th February, 2013 at a Maxwell concert in Lagos (he is one of our very favorite musicians), I was honest enough to say 'Maybe yes' and he was gracious enough to say 'I'll accept that, "Dee". From you I'll accept that and thank you'. 

We talked for 6 hours immediately after and I said 'Hey, guess what?' he said ' What?'... then I said 'Yes. '.

We didn't walk in blind, not completely blind anyway. We were both broken in many different ways and I brought a lot of baggage, but 4 years after we are loving and living and I'm thankful for both of us. 

~ D.O.S


Here's Ronke's story:

So... here goes...my sister's sister-in-law and his [my husband's] sister were at Uni together. So Sister A, the sister-in-law, had tickets to this Donnie McClukin concert. I went by Sister A's place to pick mine up. Suddenly found out that I'd be chauffeuring them to the concert. No worries...small price to pay for free tickets, right?

So off we go and again there are a change of plans...apparently need to pick up Sister B's brother on the way. Don't think I suspected anything at this point. Until he started to talk to me at the concert. I was civil but not overly warm. 

I got a bit cold though when I found out I needed to drop him off at home afterwards. I gave him my number anyway...not that I was interested!! Really I wasn't but didn't see the harm...he didn't strike me as the stalker type.

He called me and a friendship of sorts began and the rest as they say is history!!!

~ Ronke



The moral of these stories is you just never know what a random day out and about might bring in terms of finding love! The possibilities are endless and your love story might not play out as you have planned or hoped. Perhaps there's a far more interesting plot that awaits you! ;)