The Women Have Spoken...What They Want Men to Know!

The women have spoken!!! Yay! What they have to say might surprise you. We found out what the men want women to know and now it's time for the women to share.

So, I asked some of my friends and here's what they had to say:

“I’d say women are not fools and what’s good for the goose is good for the gander. I’ve never understood why there are double standards and men think it’s ok to cheat and women can’t”
- Kiki, 29

“Women are completely different from men and they need to be understood and treated differently. No woman can resist extravagant, unconditional love, men need to learn and perfect the art of loving a woman” - Bukky, 29

“All women are not the same” - Teegirl, 30

“Women love to be loved i.e. I love a man who’s in love and not afraid or ashamed to show it. And showing it is not only about gifts, dinners, or “love yous”, the lil’ stuff is just as important” – Onome, 30

“My message to men is simple. Communicate with your woman like you are explaining 2 X 2 to a child. Sounds funny but the extra lines you say help to build a trust bond. Why? It is commonly agreed by some that women have a hard time “hearing” or “understanding”; for example, a guy says “I need to go out” and the woman hears/understands it differently...And probably mashes it up with whatever situation just occurred before and heard “I’d rather go out than stay with you and argue”. But if he said “We’ll continue this later, you are important but I’m meant to see my friends. I’ll be back at 10 and we’ll continue”, it’s so many words but he’s given a promise, a trust, and an assurance in one phrase. It’s a lot to ask but hey, …it’s the glitch fix. – Dee, 32

“Want men to know that it’s ok to cry sometimes. It doesn’t make you look weak. It makes you more human and even more lovable. When women cry sometimes, we are not just being cheap and throwing a “low blow” to turn the tables in out favor, we just want to vent sometimes and that’s a great way to vent for us” – Wunmi, 33

“Women want to feel safe around men. Don’t yell at them when you are angry. A woman’s shout isn’t as menacing as a man’s. If she raises her voice, take a time out. Most of all, please don’t hit her” - Ibinabo, 32

“Love God crazy, love me die” - Faith, 26

“I don’t want to have sex with you. Don’t keep assuming. Don’t ask me to change my hair. You met me this way or you beat it” – Yinka, 33

“When they make a promise, no matter how small or trivial it looks, they should learn to keep it. I say this cos I have had to break friendships, just ordinary friendships with guys (one married, 2 single) who thought they could just joke around making promises and never doing anything about them. I won’t take it. It means your friend really doesn’t mean anything to you. For me, that’s a waste of my time. Make promises (we didn’t ask you, you promised), keep it. I feel very strongly about that. – Zee, 40

You've heard them! Any surprises guys? Other ladies reading this, please share what you'd like the men to know.

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  1. Hey!
    Good one 'Deronke, Kiki, Teegirl, Bukky, Onome, Dee, Wunmi, Ibinabo(my sisters' name sake), Faith, Yinka, and Zee.
    It'll surprise you to know that quite a number of dudes know these things but carelessly pay less attention to them.
    Its pretty natural for the average guy to spend 3mins in the shower because he doesn't consider it necessary to use a daily exfoliating facial scrub and a different soap for the face; The same way its pretty natural for him to give his woman a peck and simply say "honey need to run" and dash out the door.

    I'm saying, the average guy pays a lot less attention to little details. Not because he doesn't love you a WHOLE lot, but its just in the nature of man to be an "on the surface" dweller.

    I love Dee's comment and can relate with that. I've had female friends go quiet and turn inwards for days cos of little seemingly harmless phrases.

    So before I talk too much(which I have already done), ladies understand your man and be patient with him. It will take a while for him to learn to use his magnifying lenses to spot the seemingly tiny dots.
    And dudes, as they say, the little things matter the most; take some more time to notice her, be more attentive to her needs(which are in many cases what we don't even think about), and observe her. A little extra attention to the seemingly less important does a LOT of magic.

    Hope I haven't over spoken?

  2. I agree, both sides need to be patient. Men need to work on the little things and make more time for their ladies because throwing money at a relationship won't fix anything. women need to understand that when a man says he's going left, take him at his word and don't suspect he's going 270 degrees due south because of how he's said it. If you're both grown, act like it, and communication is at the heart of your relationships, you'll be fine.


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