Desperately Want to Get Married?

DON'T! I was thinking about this yesterday and it occured to me that I don't think people who desperately want to get married should. Think about it...remember when you rushed to do anything? Remember how it felt afterwards? How it wasn't such a big deal, how you felt a bit of disappointment cos whatever it was you rushed into didn't turn out to be all that. When people rush to do things, they're not usually ready for it or in the right frame of mind. I think it's the same with marriage. If you're feeling the pressure, you think there's nothing really left for you to do other than get married, you think the clock (especially the biological one) is ticking, think again. I almost think people should fight the temptation to rush into marriage. They say good things come to those who wait and that includes marriage too! You know the sweetest things come when you least expect it. You know, you're minding your own business, doing you, taking things easy, and then he/she shows up (or they've been there all along and they wake up! LOL). Either way, you weren't really looking, you're not desperate so you can make a clear decision. Being in a hurry is probably one of the main reasons why people settle for less than best and later they remark "he wasn't really my type" or "he became attractive in my eyes later in marriage"...while these can genuinely be the case, what were they doing not marrying their type in the first place. Lol. I think sometimes when people rush into things, they settle...

So, if you're feeling pressured, and you desperately want to get married....DON'T! DON'T DO IT! Wait, talk yourself out of it. It will happen evetually but you gotta be in the right frame of mind.

What do you think? Can pressure make people rush into marriages they have no business in?


  1. Great post! Hear hear! Pleeeeaaaaase hear!

    The pressure (especially in Nigeria) can be suffocating. Even when you want to do the right thing by being patient and wait for the right one; Nigerians knowingly and unknowingly apply a mountain load of pressure.

    It’s just the way our culture and society is made. So yes, pressure makes us rush in…family pressure, peer pressure, age pressure, even ‘church pressure’ sef. Yes! Church pressure…they pray for you: “Sister in the name of Jesus in 6 months we will do a service blessing your marriage”…and YOU coupled with your desperation, unknowingly start to look at every available man as a potential to make that 6 month prayer point! Rather than sit back and let God’s will be done.

    (Hmmmm…this is a really good discussion point: Does the church apply pressure too?)

    Let’s be practical with our choice. ‘Forever’ and ‘Till death do us part’ in many cases is a long arse time.

    Remember, the pressure pushers around us will not be there after “I DO”. Its just you and the stranger you claimed forever with.

    1. Dee: so true I’ve heard that "well-intentioned" prayer or prophecy from/to people in the church and I always think of 1 John 4:1. Try the spirit the Spirit. If it was truly the word and will of God, at the time they allege, it will happen.

      Moreover, I’ve heard opposing teachings regarding prophecy on marriages, jobs, kids and things of that nature.

      I would caution people to watch who they let speak into their lives. You can’t just let any(church-attending)body “prophecy” into your life.

  2. I finally get the chance to comment on this blog!!!! yaay! One of the major reasons, amongst others why people rush into such decisions is because they make marriage a criteria for their happiness. Singles should learn to be happy as singles so that they value for their life is big in their eyes, and in the eyes of the people they want to spend their lives with. There's also family pressure and peer pressure. It's really tough to control these things and make a strong decision to stay single until we've got the best deal. So you've got to be happy, doing something you love and achieving your dreams (or at least be on the path to). This I believe will fetch you strength and stability to control whatever pressures will push u to making a bad decision.

  3. in this nja
    pressure is too much
    i cant count the number of bb pins i av recived
    just to encourage me meet the man
    one thing i know
    is focus on other things
    like your career education,every other thing
    its when you aint looking that your man/woman will come

  4. but i wont lie
    i feel so desperate sometimes!!!!!


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