A Very Deep Question

I'm reading a book at the moment and I came across a very deep question. You know, when we are looking for that "perfect" spouse, we usually have all kinds of requirements, right? Your friends probably say you're too picky but you insist you have standards. I think it's very important to have standards. You gotta be with someone you really want to be with. I remember a pastor once said "marry your temptation" and I doubt that anyone wants to live that Luther song for real, you know, the "if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with" Chai!

However, the only concern I have is that perhaps sometimes we are too hard on other human beings. I always say 'don't ask another human being to be what you're not'. If I want a kind, gentle, loyal, Godly, man, I gotta be kind, gentle, loyal, Godly. You get me? We can't expect him/her to be what we are not. This isn't to say that we shouldn't have complimentary traits but I do think that sometimes the pressure we might put on the other person to be "perfect" can be a bit extreme.

This leads me back to the book I'm reading. The couple who wrote the book talked about a very, very important question that can shed a lot of light on who we are. Here it is: HOW WOULD YOU LIKE BEING MARRIED TO YOURSELF? Now, that's deep. That's real deep. Once we are able to answer that question, it will give us insight into the kind of person we are and what it is like being married to us or what it would be like for the person who marries us. Once we figure that out, I think we just might see a few things we could work on in ourselves...


  1. First!

    I would very much enjoy being married to myself. Sadly, meeting a fitness buff that contemplates life on other planets, deeply questions religion, tweets extensively about a variety of topics and enjoys playing around with European and Middle Eastern accents is nothing more than a dream. However, a life alone with such awesomeness doesn't sound so bad. That's why I'm currently in search of "Going Solo: The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of Living Alone" by Eric Klinberg, a Professor of Sociology at NYU.

    "Hell is other people" - Jean-Paul Sartre

  2. Teh comment above is so funny! Lool.

    I had some sort of epiphany one day, and I called it 'The Shoe, on the Other Foot!' Am I everything I want in the man I want to marry? Answer the question, gbam, and there you have it.
    We want perfect, yet we are far from ...biko, shoe, on the other foot!

  3. Rotus, hilarious response and ever so poignant. You actually sound like me, but I'm not really a fitness buff.

    I think I'd be ok being married to myself but I would have to make a number of adjustments. I can be a bit broody and sarcastic, and I constantly have to remind myself that I need to take it easy on others. Usually I am no harder than others than I am on myself, but I guess what that means is that I need to take it easy on myself every now and then.

  4. Great question...I asked myself that question and I am beginning to see what you mean. By the way what is the name of the book?

    Dele O


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